It is traumatic to watch the misery parade of young women being “escorted” to the clinics with their boyfriends who will soon be gone out of their lives. Today, I stood across the street with my “I regret lost fatherhood” sign, my friend Frances held her “I regret my abortion” sign (our abortions are not related).
A 17 year old girl approached us after sitting nearby for about an hour watching us. She had tattoos all over her arms, and lip rings and clothing that exposed more of her body than was covered up. She was very pretty underneath her Goth eyeliner, but her emotional turmoil was in her eyes. She defiantly asked “Are you guys paid to be here?” I said “No, I’m here on my own time, for no money and no other reason than to share my experience with abortion.” She said “I had an abortion last year…sometimes people can’t go through with a pregnancy, and I’d never tell someone what to do.”
I told her my experience with abortion and Frances told her story. This young girl then shared what it was like for her abortion. She had been date raped, and her mother and everyone around her pressured her to have an abortion but she wasn’t sure. She went into the abortion doctor’s office for the interview in Toronto balling her eyes out. The “doctor” said “Toughen up, why are you here? If you can’t handle it get out!” She “toughened up” and stayed.
She talked about the excruciating pain of having her feet put in stirrups and seeing the 10 inch instrument forced up into her uterus, and being in such searing pain that they strapped down her wrists and had two nurses hold down her torso as the doctor ripped her baby from her womb. Afterwards she wanted to die. She cut herself with razor blades all over her body and ended up in a psych ward. The walls were blank but she saw children running all around on the walls and she was in incredible turmoil. When she got out she got tattoos all over. She lifted up the front of her shirt and showed us a tattoo over her uterus of a thorn thicket. She said it represented her now inhospitable uterus. She said “It’s a big lie what this world says, it’s a real baby, and I will never be able to replace my lost baby, and I may not be able to have kids anymore because of complications.” She continued “I don’t know how to get over it.” I replied “I know who to come to terms with it. It is God. After many years of trying every self destructive thing to get over it, I found that in the end, it was God who heals, and it starts with fully accepting what we’ve done and then humbly asking God for forgiveness. It’s a lifetime journey. There is help out there, I can help you find it.”
She changed to the subject to how she tried to talk a friend out of abortion, but she said she would support no matter what … then suddenly it all came together for me… she was waiting for her friend who, at that very minute, was going through the same thing on the 3rd floor across the street at the Morgentaler abortion clinic. My heart leapt into my throat and I choked back the tears. I said “I am really sorry that this is happening.” I told her about Rachel’s Vineyard, and said that I would pray for her. Then she walked across the street to rejoin the misery parade, and I turned away, I couldn’t look anymore.
Please join us in prayerfully and quietly witnessing to the great scourge of abortion and helping those who see no way out.